Here’s the story. A friend of mine got into a car accident about a month ago. They’re perfectly fine, no worries! But he didn’t have insurance.

He accidentally (that’s why they’re called accidents, right?) hit an old lady’s bumper. And of course, this being Miami, full of angry Hispanic old people, the old woman got out of her car and started screaming. Since he had no insurance, he ended up having to pretty much grovel at her son to let him go on his way. He ended up playing $150 out of his pocket and they let him go.

Because people are out for money. Always. It’s a really cynical world.

He was pretty happy he didn’t have insurance. But I told him, he’s lucky, not happy. Any other douche out there would’ve ripped him further apart. But then he started showing me insurance quotes online, and I realized how much of a pain it is to actually get insurance nowadays. A few years ago, the rates weren’t so high. And most companies tried not to raise the rates for customers that are with them a few years.

So honestly, lucky or getting on to something, avoid old ladies. That is the moral of the story. Old Hispanic ladies.

Online shopping is absolutely dangerous when you have no money to blow. Not a penny. I’ve been looking at the craziest places, just trying to get a good deal on something. But at the end, I figure the best option would be to not spend the money at all. Let’s take a look at a few places for starters.

There’s ThinkGeek. I just bought my boyfriend a few little birthday gift trinkets from there. I bought him an all in one screwdriver keychain that he practically had an orgasm over (I love my nerdy boyfriend!), and a LOLcat book. With one day shipping, it all cost about thirty three bucks. Not bad at all, honestly. So if you have a geeky person you need to buy stuff for (or you want to spend some of your money to treat yourself to something geeky and nerdy!), definitely go to ThinkGeek.

As far as clothes go? I usually go to shirt sites like Threadless and Woot Shirts. Recently, I had Panda Pad and hip hop clothing brought to my attention. I prefer Panda Pad, but those of you with a more distinct urban taste can shop at Jimmy Jazz instead.

Not all of the stuff on these websites are cheap. There are much fancier stuff, that do more things or generally cost more because it’s harder to make. When in doubt? Shop at Etsy. I’d blow so much money there if I’d let myself.

I’m not often a cynic. Actually, if you know me in person, I tend to be a really happy ol’ gal. Despite being insanely clueless and naive at times. But hey, what can I say? A girl’s got her flaws. (dies laughing)

I used to stay up until the wee early mornings and watch the Hell out of television. I’d see the craziest infomercials you can imagine. From magical fruit that makes you lose weight, to the world’s most insane juicer. But a lot of these infomercials just make me feel like a bad person. I always end the program feeling like I’m a jerk, and all the people on the screen are liars.

Take the magical weight losing fruit I was talking about earlier. Every time I see those weight loss success stories I think they’re full of crap. And it gets me angry. Those people were more than likely paid to say a bunch of crap about the product, and be super excited about it. Unless that’s been banned or made illegal in the last ten years, I don’t believe any of the infomercials I see.

What sort of programs or discussions leave you feeling like you’re a horrible person? Or just feeling guilty that you don’t believe it? That you didn’t fall into the trap? Lemme know!